There are a little known band of insurgents around our way who are rarely heard of. They are usually more active around this time of the year.
The time of the year when the days are getting that little bit chillier and you find yourself slipping a jumper over the T-shirt when going outside.
Summer flowers are shedding the last of their pretty heads.
The trees lose their leaves like I lose my memory.
Political parties have their annual mutual back slapping farce.
Days are getting shorter and the shops are filling up with Christmas (aarrgghh!!!!) goodies.
This is the time of the year when the wood elves are at their most mischievous.
I kid you not and you may well indeed mock, but open entering that feared and mysterious dark place called East Hoath Woods beware the elves at work.
Last week it was an acorn.
Yesterday a sweet chestnut was the preferred weapon of limited destruction i.e. a few brain cells.
You know that Autumn has indeed arrived, when foreign objects pepper your bonce from above, courtesy of the wood elves.
I know it's them because I never catch sight of them and I am sure I heard some giggling when the spiny chestnut hit its target.
They cannot hide forever.
My day will come..............(much cackling ensues).